So much has happened since my last update…
So I went back and had a few more scans- a special kind of CT Scan to zoom in on the area of the tumour (not a pleasant experience given where it is!) They have to inflate your colon with air to get a clear picture. I’ll spare you the details. But luckily it worked OK and they got a good shot of Trevor the tumour. I also had another MRI scan which was to try and get a closer look at how the tumour was possibly attached to my left ovary.
When we went in to discuss the results with the doctors, they showed us some of the scans, but it’s really hard to understand them- you clearly need to know what you are looking at. It wasn’t like an obvious ‘sticking out’ tumour in the picture but more of a strange slight swelling in areas.
Surgery was then confirmed for the 9th August for a high anterior bowel resection- which basically means they would be taking out about a foot of colon – the sigmoid colon which is the last part of the colon.
According to my online research 75% of bowel cancer occurs in the sigmoid colon. In my mind I suppose it’s where all the ‘rubbish’ sort of piles up as it’s at the end of the colon – that is how I was imagining this imbalance of cells happened.
Of course there’s a part of me that is now reviewing my not-so-healthy diet in recent months and wondering if the extra sugar craving was due to Trevor, or had I just let myself get into bad habits. Either way, there was no point dwelling on it as it wasn’t going to change anything. Generally, I eat well- I don’t eat much meat, I barely drink, and I love a good green smoothie. So I didn’t meet any of the typical markers for someone to have bowel cancer.
I was very lucky as they were also able to arrange a gynae surgeon to join for the first part of the operation to check about the attachment to the Ovary and to check the cyst they found there was just an endometrial cyst and nothing more sinister.
The surgery would take about 4-5 hours and was classed as a major operation.
Amongst all this, normal life carries on to some extent and it was a welcome break to have everyone over to celebrate Leo’s 5th Birthday on the 6th August- it had actually been planned for this date as we were planning to be away over his actual birthday on the 23rd. We hired a bouncy castle which was a huge hit not just for him but my sisters and brother in law!
I also took a quiet moment as we had it overnight and went on it to lie down and do some meditation whilst looking up at the stars in the sky. It really is times like this that enable you to truly appreciate all the things in your life to be grateful for.
Back to the healing plan… I was glad to get the surgery date booked in so soon, and I was glad they thought this was the best course of action rather than treating straight away with chemotherapy- it was positive news that they were able to take it out. It was classed as stage 3 as it has just started penetrating the muscle wall of the colon. I was hoping for stage 2, knowing the stage 1 would be very unlikely given the symptoms I was having of blood when going to the loo and lower abdominal pain and tiredness. But I was just grateful it wasn’t stage 4 (and praying they don’t find anything to say otherwise in surgery).
Knowing you are about to go in for major surgery certainly gets your brain thinking in a different kind of way. I knew I needed support spiritually so I turned to several different practices which I’ll share about in more detail in another post.
For me it was really about connecting back to my deep belief that everything happens for a reason and there are no coincidences in life. I believe this is a part of the journey my soul agreed to undertake as a human physical experience here on earth. When I see it in that light, it gives me huge inner strength to keep going and to believe that I’ll come out stronger the other side. Who knows, perhaps I’ll even end up working with other women who find themselves in this position in the future.