Dealing with Anxiety after Cancer

Cancer Journey

17 Oct

Going through cancer is one of the toughest things life can throw at you- both for the person going through it and their loved ones. However, maintaining a calm mindset as much as possible and stopping going negative thought spirals too often helps with the healing process. When I found myself getting anxious, I found some strategies that helped that I wanted to share with you.

I also wanted to share that sometimes, it is actually helpful to allow the negative thought spirals to take their course and to allow the 'negative space' for these feelings to be expressed. Actually a technique I use with 1:1 clients is about helping them feel safe to express worst case scenarios as suppressing them all the time isn't healthy either. So this post is written with tips for those times when you just want to calm the nerves rather than allow the negativity spiral to develop.

Generally, I feel like I'm now living at a much higher sensitivity to stress (just over a year after diagnosis). So I use these methods on a daily basis.

It is hard as it's so easy to think that every ache and pain could be bad news, but instead of focusing on the negatives, we need to train our brains to build a sense of fortitude and resilience.

Tips for when you are struggling to sleep:

Play The ABC game

Basically chose a topic where there are multiple answers A-Z. Such as ‘Countries of the world’ or 'fruits and vegetables' or 'makes of car' - run through coming up with answers in your mind such as ‘Argentina, Brazil, Chile...’ or 'Apples, Bananas, Carrots' etc as long as you can. This keeps your conscious mind occupied and stops the negative thought spirals. I find that I get through A-Z once and then start on the second round and start to drift off after that. This one is great as there are literally an endless source of different topics you could use!

Essential Oils

This may seem obvious but essential oils can tap into a deep part of our mind that enables that reptilian part of our mind responsible for the stress hormones to be calmed down. I loved using Lavendar and Frankincense on a daily basis when I was going through chemo. Then I found Aura sprays - the ones by Sons of Asgard and Starchild Glastonbury spoke to me as they are imbued with certain energies that I found really helped calm me. Experiment and find what works for you. There are different types- from incense sticks you burn, to water-based diffusers, or simply putting some on a tissue to smell. I also used them during labour with my son and they really helped me get through pain and discomfort.

An Acupressure Facial Roller & Mat

This has become a pre-bedtime relaxing ritual to use this on my face to help reduce post-chemo puffiness and I also find it strangely soothing. If you have sensitive skin, maybe go for a smooth one rather than one with spikes!

I also found the acupressure mat that was recommended to me helped give me a sense of allowing out the negative emotions- though I'd say to avoid in the days immediately after chemo when you are hyper-sensitive.

Give Yourself Reiki!

Focus positive intention and healing energy into your hands and then place them over the area that feels like it needs healing- for me it was over the area the tumour had been and the surgery scars. Feel the warmth of your hands and imagine white healing light pouring from them into where it’s needed. I do this in the evenings just when I've got into bed and turned the lights out.

Small every day things you can do

I found these small things also helped me get through hard times:

Think and focus on the women you know who’ve been through this and are year out the other side- one lady I connected with is 11 years post bowel cancer. Don't know any? Find some on social media using hashtags like #cancersurvivor or look on the Shine Cancer website

Take a Deep breath, as deep as you can, hold it for 5-10 seconds, then release whilst counting to ten, and pressing your fingers in order gently into body (first finger, second finger etc)
Shake it out - shake and imagine all the crappy feelings being shaken out of you - this is actually proven to be effective at reducing stress (be careful and do it gently if you're on chemo though)
I love pulled Oracle cards for guidance - they give you a positive message to focus on- I especially like the Rebecca Campbell Starseed Oracle deck - you don't need any special knowledge or experience to use them - these are not Tarot, they come with a guide book that tells you about the card you picked.
Listen to 5 minute meditation to reframe (Use the Insight timer app as there are so many on there for free)
Have solfeggio frequency playing in ears - search on Spotify for these healing frequencies
Write about it / share about it - this really helped me to journal and get the feelings and thoughts out of me and onto a page or laptop screen.

Bigger Things requiring more time / money

Go for reiki healing - search for a local therapist in your area (it can also be done remotely but I'd recommend starting with in-person)

Gong / sound bath - the sound taps into parts of your brain you can't reach consciously
Yoga (recent research study shows it helps post cancer by reducing inflammation)
Breathwork - Transformational Breathwork and Wim Hoff - these practices gave me a sense of control over my bodily responses and calm in the face of anxiety
Go for a massage / spa day / swim - spending time in /around water always helps me
O2 therapy - search online for hyperbaric oxygen therapy near you- it helps your body heal and I find it relaxing to spend an hour inside a capsule (maybe not great if you're claustrophobic!)

Nature as a healer

If you're able to spend time outside depending on your local area, it's been shown that it helps reduce anxiety, and spending time in woodlands actually helps your microbiome.

Cold water - swim in sea

Forest - tap into nature
Write on a piece of paper all you want to let go of and bury it in the woods or burn it
Follow cycle of the Moon- release when it wanes, and build when it waxes - add the dates to your diary with reminders or get an app
If you can - go for a retreat with no technology

Sit with your values to focus on what truly matters to you

Going through something like cancer can lead to a bit of an existential crisis- you reassess everything.

Our values are what drives us- living a life not aligned to our values creates stress and frustration. Spend some time getting clear on yours- they are unique to you and are not beliefs you were taught as a child such as the importance of being punctual, but will be deeper like wanting to be innovative, or wanting to live with a sense of freedom and flexibility. Basically - what gives you a sense of purpose and joy - follow those little nudges from your soul.

Download my Core Values Workbook

Using trackers

Use a cyclical tracker whether or not you have a menstrual cycle right now- monitor your patterns so you can anticipate them - really bad PMT for example - this may be more linked to the moon cycle if you don't currently have a menstrual cycle, but we are all cyclical creatures by nature!

Fitbit - I use mine to monitor stress responses
Oura ring - monitor sleep and activity levels - I will write a separate post about this as there are so many insights you can get from wearing one
HRV - Heart Rate Variation- I found this the most accurate as a measure of overall health - I saw it dip when on Chemo and then gradually recover over 6-7 months.

Support groups & Courses

Research what is available in your local area - you can always start with the Macmillan help line or a simple google search. I am incredibly grateful to my local cancer centre, The Mulberry Centre by West Middlesex hospital - through them I've accessed free Yoga, Reiki, Tai Chi, Watercolour workshops, coffee mornings and group walks.